I thought today was Friday all day. I played the “BLONDE” card as much as possible, but I also kept referring to my caffeine withdrawal to help offset my apparent incompetence. I think for the most part, I was successful in this task. I am dead tired. I think part of me expected to have more energy as a blonde. I think I also expected some weight loss. Neither has happened.
I’m not sure why I’ve been carrying these assumptions around with me, but you can probably understand where they’ve come from. Most movies involve bubbly, buxom blondes who giggle and have fun and don’t have a care in the world. I’m also associated blonde-ness with, like, skinny Baywatch bitches. No wonder I’m so hard on myself for not fulfilling these unrealistic ideals. I need to accept myself for who and what I am – regardless of my physical appearance – which, in essence, is the entire reason I’m conducting this sociological experiment. So have I made any progress? Today it feels like very little. I still see myself as having value only based on my physical attributes, which, admittedly is kind of fucked up. These thoughts and feels are the COMPLETE AND TOTAL ANTITHESIS of the thoughts and attitudes that I’ve been expressing. I feel like a fat, ugly, BLONDE phony wannabe feminist.
But I am a walking contradiction and I think, for the moment, I’m going to have to be okay with that.
Today gets 2 Barbie Warhols: 
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