Day 36

(found this on http://lipstick-feminists.org that site is so awesome)

I went to the bank today and as I walked in, a guy was coming out and I got a “Damn girl.” I was wearing my yellow skirt with white polka dots. I think that had to be it, but his comment got me thinking… What motivates my apparel? Am I actively pursuing the male gaze? Granted, today I was wearing a t-shirt and a skirt, but when I do dress provocatively, why do I do so? Most of the time I think it’s because I enjoy being fashionable and like feeling confident. It's not my fault how people perceive me. I finished reading Tina Fey's Bossypants and aside from some blonde-bashing (she gets upset with her daughter liking blonde Sleeping Beauty more than brunette Snow White and refers to blondes as yellow-haired), she does have some great moments in the book that stuck with me. This is one of them:

"Amy [Poehler] was in the middle of some such nonsense with Seth Myers across the table, and she did something vulgar as a joke. I can’t remember what it was exactly, except it was dirty and loud and ‘unladylike.’
Jimmy Fallon, who was arguably the star of the show at the time, turned to her and in a faux-squeamish voice said, ‘Stop that! It’s not cute! I don’t like it.’
Amy dropped what she was doing, went black in the eyes for a second, and wheeled around on him. ‘I don’t fucking care if you like it.’ Jimmy was visibly startled. Amy went right back to enjoying her ridiculous bit. I should make it clear that Jimmy and Amy are very good friends and there was never any real beef between them. (Insert penis joke here.)
With that exchange, a comic shift took place. Amy made it clear that she wasn’t there to be cute. She wasn’t there to play wives and girlfriends in the boys’ scenes. She was there to do what she wanted to do and she did not fucking care if you like it."

Thanks, Tina and Amy, I found my new motto: “I don’t fucking care if you like it.”

I think it’s a very antiquated ideal for men to whistle at broads as they walk by to express their desire. Most of the time, I just ignore any catcalls and go on with my life. I used to look at it as a compliment, but now I’m just kind of… put off by it. You don’t see women doing that to men and if we did, it would probably be considered outrageous (I’m pretty sure this would only occur on an episode of “The Bad Girls’ Club,” not that I’ve seen an entire episode of that show). It’s one of many double standards between the sexes. I’m not about to let my eyebrows get unruly, but not because of dudes, it’s because I like them that way. Either way, I don’t fucking care if you like it.

For example, I tinted and waxed my own eyebrows today. It was not a disaster. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you put your mind to it. I found it incredibly ironic that I tinted my eyebrows using “Just for Men: Beard and Mustache.” I’m sure that most men would never admit to using such a product, let alone on their eyebrows. If men waxed their eyebrows, they would be derided as being “gay” (don’t get me started on that term). It got me singing the Madonna song “What It Feels Like For a Girl”:

Girls can wear jeans

And cut their hair short

Wear shirts and boots

'Cause it's OK to be a boy

But for a boy to look like a girl is degrading

'Cause you think that being a girl is degrading

I’m a feminist, and I’m okay with that. I don’t fucking care if you like it. I’ve never gone all Rosie the Riveter or anything before (okay, so I was in The Vagina Monologues in college, but whatevs), but sometimes the shit I see and hear makes me angry. I overhear my neighbor argue with his girlfriend and it’s kind of appalling. “You’re like a little girl crying when she doesn’t get an ice cream cone.” “Babe, that beer’s skunked because you left it in the car. I’m not fucking drinking it.” Granted, she’s annoying as hell, but the way he talks to her makes me want to VOM. I also wish my walls were better insulated.

Who knew being blonde could make you a feminist? I don’t fucking care if you like it. I love it.

Today gets 5 Barbie Warhols (and I don’t fucking care if you like it):